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mortalcityI have this horrible restless feeling tonight. I need to write something - anything, all the things - but I'm also so terrified of writing right now that I can't even bring myself to open a notebook or a document. I feel like something's trying to claw its way out of my chest but I just can't let it out and I don't know why.
A few days ago, I had one of my recurring dreams (or actually a couple recurring dreams mashed together) - the creepy house with the yellow room in the attic, and a touch of the hotel that's also a labyrinth. It's not worth explaining, they're just parts of my normal dream landscape that never bode well; there are monsters in those places I don't know and can't fight.
But this time there was an aspect to the house that was never there before: a room on the ground floor, close to the front door (and the entrance to the labyrinth :\), warm and bright even though it didn't have any windows. And the monsters were coming and there was nowhere to run, but I knew I'd be safe anyway if I covered the walls of that room in words, and I did, and I was.
That's how I feel now, just like in that dream, except I don't know the words that will save me, and I'm too paralyzed with irrational terror to even start looking. I just don't know what to do.
A few days ago, I had one of my recurring dreams (or actually a couple recurring dreams mashed together) - the creepy house with the yellow room in the attic, and a touch of the hotel that's also a labyrinth. It's not worth explaining, they're just parts of my normal dream landscape that never bode well; there are monsters in those places I don't know and can't fight.
But this time there was an aspect to the house that was never there before: a room on the ground floor, close to the front door (and the entrance to the labyrinth :\), warm and bright even though it didn't have any windows. And the monsters were coming and there was nowhere to run, but I knew I'd be safe anyway if I covered the walls of that room in words, and I did, and I was.
That's how I feel now, just like in that dream, except I don't know the words that will save me, and I'm too paralyzed with irrational terror to even start looking. I just don't know what to do.
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